Introducing....the Stella Awards. Like the winners of Darwin Awards, these people exhibit extraordinary stupidity. However, the differences are that for the most part, they remain alive to potentially wreak further havoc on the world and they achieve their goals through other beings completely devoid of moral fortitude - their lawyers..........at least the Darwin Award winners have the decency to exit the gene pool. How satisfying for all of us if the Stella nominees did the same AND TOOK THE LAWYERS OUT WITH THEM.
Enjoy.
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In 1994, a New Mexico jury awarded $ 2.9 million U.S. in damages to 81-year-old
Stella Liebeck who suffered third-degree burns to her legs, groin and buttocks
after spilling a cup of McDonald's coffee on herself. This case inspired an
annual award - The "Stella" Award - for the most frivolous lawsuit
in the U.S. The ones listed below are clear
candidates.
All these cases are verging on the outright ridiculous and yet with the right attorney you could win anything! (see OJ trial)
1. January 2000: Kathleen Robertson of Austin Texas was awarded $780,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running amok inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving tyke was Ms. Robertson's son.
2. June 1998: A 19 year old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000 and medical expenses when his neighbour ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Mr. Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car, when he was trying to steal his neighbours hubcap.
3. October 1998: A Terrence Dickson of Bristol Pennsylvania was exiting a house
he finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to get the garage
door to go up, because the automatic door opener was malfunctioning. He couldn't
re-enter the house because the door connecting the house and garage locked when
he pulled it shut. The
family was on vacation. Mr.Dickson found himself locked in the garage for eight
days. He subsisted on a case of Pepsi he found, and a large bag of dry dog food.
Mr. Dickson sued the homeowner's insurance claiming the situation caused him
undue mental anguish. The jury agreed to the tune of half a million dollars.
4. October 1999: Jerry Williams of Little Rock Arkansas was awarded $14,500 and medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door neighbour's beagle. The beagle was on a chain in it's owner's fenced-in yard, as was Mr. Williams. The award was less than sought because the jury felt the dog may have been provoked by Mr. Williams who, at the time, was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.
5. May 2000: A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania $113,500 after she slipped on soft drink and broke her coccyx. The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson threw it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.
6. December 1997: Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware successfully sued the owner of a night club in a neighbouring city when she fell from the bathroom window to the floor and knocked out her two front teeth. This occurred while Ms.Walton was trying to sneak through the window in the ladies room to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 and dental expenses.
7. And just so you know that cooler heads do occasionally prevail:
Kenmore inc., the makers of Dorothy Johnson's microwave, were found not liable
for the death of Mrs. Johnson's poodle after she gave it a bath and attempted
to dry it by putting the poor creature in her microwave for, "just a few
minutes, on low," The case was quickly dismissed.
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